We hear a lot about faith being a ‘relationship’ not a ‘religion’. I thought I had that sussed for a long time. In fact, I discovered that I had been subtly slipping into a busy ministry and home life. I thought I was working for God but my life was miserable. There was no conversation, the foundation of any relationship!

The joy of relating to my Saviour was a distant memory. The freedom of sitting in stillness to hear God’s gentle voice resonating in my heart was long gone. What had replaced it was lots of ‘activity’ that looked good, yet was empty. I hardly picked up my guitar and sang, unless it was Sunday or a church event. I was exhausted. Adding to the exhaustion was the heaviness of money problems. Debt had taken hold. My family and I were drowning.

God’s rescue was heartbreaking but healing all at the same time. For weeks, while the kids were at school, I found myself sitting on the sofa, bible open with every emotion under the sun spewing out. It truly could be related to a weather storm! This is the context in which ‘Hurricane’ was born.

I had been whisked up by a hurling hurricane. I had no control. Yet, quietly and gently I began to hear God say in a whisper ‘Come Away with Me, listen’. So I began to keep a diary and God began to speak and heal. My relationship with God was beginning to look more like a conversation and I was experiencing an unexplainable peace.

My family and I are still on a journey. We experience both ‘extreme weather’ and the stillness of ‘mountain tops’ highs. However, I am so aware that my conversation with God, guards my heart with peace and assurance in all weather conditions! I believe God has taught me the importance of prioritising time alone with Him, even if I am washing up! It is an anchor for my soul. I simply cannot do this life without Him, I just can’t.

Esther Sardar

Singer/Songwriter & Musician